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November 21, 2014


I’ve always wanted to grow up being popular. I was an attention seeker. Look I could blame it on absent daddy issues, but that story is tied now. Point is I was an attention seeker. I was one of the girls who wore the shortest skirts. I was the one who was loud. I was the one who sent “secret admirer” letters to the school newspaper and unashamedly signed my name so that it wasn’t much of a secret (I see my Mmabatho High School friends giggling at those newspaper love letters to a certain Mr.Mokoena LOL). Then I went to varsity and I still sort attention; dyed my hair blonde. Wore shorts, tiny skirts and dresses (I had the body for it, so hell yeah I was flaunting). You know the varsity drill. I’m sure we’ve all kinda-sorta been there.

I then hit the streets of Jo’burg and thought to myself I was going to be a celebrity. All I wanted was to be on TV or in a magazine, or somewhere where the world would see me. Tried signing up with several modelling agencies and I was constantly rejected either because my bum was big, or I was too skinny, or too tall or not tall enough (What did those people want?) I mingled and partied with celebrities seeking to be a celebrity out of them. It was easy because half of them were my ex high school buddies. Oh! But God just kept on saying NO! NO! NO! NO!

Then as I grew up and I stopped seeking public validation and being in the public and I decided, “Lord, I’m going to make it about you. Less of me and more of you.” I became involved in church activities and lo and behold, platforms opened up. I was entrusted with being invited to speak at events, I made it to the pulpit to teach and I made it on several radio and TV shows. So all along God had refused for me to make it in the big bad world, where I wanted what I wanted for my own pleasure. He wanted it to be to His glory.

Then as I got the attention I so sort out initially, I started not wanting it anymore. I know right. At first I just thought “I’m getting old and I don’t need this kind of public attention.” But this was validated by my watching how the lives of celebrities are so in the public eye. I put myself in these people’s shoes and I wondered how incredibly hard it has to be, to have every single corner of your life scrutinized by people who don’t even know you. They think they know you because they see you on TV and that automatically gives them the right to judge and tell you how to live your life.

I wondered how Khanyi Mbau handled the attention. Yes she wanted it, and boy did she get it. How Kelly Khumalo manages to live through reading through the horrible things people say about her on twitter as if they are God. Let me move it away from those kinds of celebrities and move it to the church. I was around when Pastor Ray got divorced to Lindy, and saw that church nearly fall apart. How people treated him like he was an entity and blurted out whatever they felt like blurting out when they wanted to.

It was after this analysis that I got down on my knees and said “Thank you Lord for closing all those doors back then. Thanks for not letting me be a celebrity.” Knowing myself and my character, and how in-spite of wanting to have been in the public eye, I respect privacy to the utmost. I respect it so much, that I find it hard to share any part of my private life with just anyone, no matter how close we are.
God knows best hey! Sometimes we look at closed doors and don’t understand why He is not giving us what we want. But He really does know and has a bigger and better reason and purpose for it, even if we can’t see it at the time. If he closes a door, it’s either He’s protecting you from something, has something better for you, or it’s just not the right time yet.

Everyone thinks that being famous is awesome. Sure, you get rich (sometimes), but like P Diddy used to say in the Puff Daddy days, “Mo’ Money, Mo’ Problems”. Of course there are many perks to being a celebrity, but is it worth it to go through all those downs?
I got 5 reasons from a celebrity friend of why it’s so tough being one:

  • You can’t get a break-ever. Imagine wanting to go shopping, or grab a coffee and having to worry about people running after you to take pictures of you.
  • Your business is not only yours anymore. It’s everybody’s.
  • It can make you or break you, depending on the strength of your character
  • Some tend to have stalkers. People are creepy out there, and can just follow you all over all day.
  • We tend to have trust issues, because you never really know if someone wants to know you for you, or because you’re a celebrity.

Ok, so this blog was scattered a bit, but in summary just take 3 things out of it:
1) Being a celebrity is not all it’s made out to be. If you are one or strive to be one, keep your life private, if anything for your own peace of mind.
2) If you are not a celebrity, don’t be so quick to judge those that are in the public eye. They maybe celebrities, but they are also only human.
3) Trust God to lead and guide your life and trust in His timing. Closed doors only lead to new doors opening, protection and safety.

One Comment leave one →
  1. Maboela permalink
    November 21, 2014 13:27

    I really enjoy your blog…

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